Seven tips for talking about a diagnosis
Here we suggest seven things to keep in mind if you decide to talk to your child about their diagnosis.
1. Understand and embrace your child’s diagnosis
You may have had a different idea about your child’s future.
Give yourself time to accept their diagnosis.
You may want to speak to someone about how you feel.
It can be helpful to learn from first-hand experience of parents and children going through similar challenges.
2. Make differences normal
You can teach your child that everyone is unique.
Some examples of differences could be:
- maybe one child loves chocolate, and the other hates it
- one friend may be great at sports, while another is great at art
- a child in their class may have an allergy to peanuts, but no one in their family does
- one parent may not be bothered by loud noises and the other can’t think straight unless it’s quiet
Even someone who has the same diagnosis as your child may have a whole different set of strengths and challenges.
3. Don't wait until they have a negative experience
Your child might feel different to others but not know why or how to talk about it.
It’s good to give them information about their differences so they don’t start to think negatively about themselves.
4. You don’t have to tell them everything at once
You can give small chunks of information to your child over several short conversations.
If your child asks a direct question about their differences, make sure you understand what they’re asking.
Before giving an answer, you might say, “That’s an interesting question. What are your thoughts about it?”
It is important to correct any wrong information they might have but do this in small amounts.
You should give only the information they are asking for at that moment. Allow them to digest it before giving more information.
Let them know you’re open to answering any questions they have now and in the future.
5. Define important terms
It may be easier to talk to your child about their strengths and challenges instead of using medical terms.
In the future, your child will need to know the definitions and terms of the disorder, disease or disability they have.
This will help them adapt to different situations throughout their life.
6. Make the information personal and meaningful to your child
Does your child have a strong interest in a certain topic? For example, dinosaurs.
With a little imagination, you can use dinosaurs when explaining things to your child.
This may help your child to understand the information and make it feel more personal.
7. Focus on coping strategies, talents, and wellbeing
Your child needs to know that a diagnosis isn’t a label.
It’s important for your child to understand that their diagnosis may not affect every aspect of their life.
While they will have challenges, you can help your child understand the positives in their unique ways of experiencing and relating to the world.
Emphasise your child’s unique capabilities and what they can do, rather than only focusing on what’s difficult.
